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Write an Email prompt

Interest in Joining Eco Warriors Club

Every scored sample answer Reach120 publishes for this prompt, banded so you can see the range rather than one version of "good".

3 sample answersInquiry

The prompt

As it appears in practice

You are a sophomore at Greenfield University interested in joining the Eco Warriors Club, a student organization focused on promoting sustainable practices on campus. The club meets every Thursday afternoon and organizes events like tree planting and recycling drives. You heard about them during the annual Student Organization Fair and are eager to get involved. Reach out to the club president, Jamie Lin, to express your interest.

What the response has to do

  • Introduce yourself and mention your major and year of study.
  • Explain why you are interested in joining the Eco Warriors Club.
  • Ask about the process for becoming a member and any upcoming meetings or events you should attend.

Written to: administration

Sample answers, by band

3 published

Reach120 practice band estimate — not an official ETS score How we estimate

Strong response

Band 5.04.0/5 rubric
To
jamie.lin@greenfielduni.edu
Subject
Interest in Joining Eco Warriors Club
Dear Jamie Lin, I hope this email finds you well. My name is [name withheld], and I am a sophomore majoring in environmental science at Greenfield University. I am interested in joining the Eco Warriors Club because I want to learn more about sustainable practices and contribute to a greener campus. I heard about the club during the annual Student Organization Fair, and I am eager to get involved. I would appreciate it if you could provide information about the process for becoming a member and any upcoming meetings or events I should attend. Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to hearing from you. Best regards, [name withheld]
Read the full feedback on this answer

Middle response

Band 4.53.5/5 rubric
To
jamie.lin@greenfielduni.edu
Subject
Interest in Joining Eco Warriors Club
Dear Sir or Madam, I hope this email finds you well. My name is [name withheld], and I am a sophomore at Greenfield University. I am interested in joining the Eco Warriors Club, a student organization focused on promoting sustainable practices on campus. I heard about the club during the annual Student Organization Fair and I am eager to get involved. I would appreciate it if you could provide the process for becoming a member and any upcoming meeting or events I should attend. Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to your response at your earliest convenence. Best regards, [name withheld]

What worked

  • Clear introduction
  • Expresses eagerness
  • Polite closing

What cost points

  • Spelling error
  • Lack of syntactic variety
Read the full feedback on this answer

Middle response

Band 4.03.0/5 rubric
To
jamie.lin@greenfielduni.edu
Subject
Interest in Joining Eco Warriors Club
Dear Mr Jamie Lin, I am Alex at greenfield university doing majors in fourth semister of the environmental sciences . I am very eager to participate in this program because I have spent my entire life by participating in local NGOS in which we plant trees and take steps that protects our nature. I would like to ask you about the process of to participate and become a member for upcoming events that can be beneficial for me so I can give awarness to communities for conserving the natural habitat. I would appreciate if you could provide any assistace. Sincerely, [name withheld]

What worked

  • Clear expression of eagerness
  • Relevant background experience
  • Polite request for information

What cost points

  • Grammatical errors
  • Lack of clarity in membership process inquiry
Read the full feedback on this answer

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